Understanding Identity Formation and Identity Disorder: A Psychotherapist’s Insight
By Amira El-Akkad, Psychotherapist
Introduction
Who am I? This is not just a philosophical question but a deeply psychological one that touches on the very foundation of mental well-being. Our sense of identity — how we see ourselves, how we relate to others, and how we make sense of our experiences — is central to healthy psychological functioning. When this process of identity formation is disrupted, it may result in what clinicians call “Identity Disorder” or “Identity Disturbance”, a phenomenon often observed in people experiencing emotional distress or personality-related difficulties.
What Is Identity Formation?
Identity formation is a developmental process that begins in early childhood and continues through adolescence and adulthood. It involves the integration of memories, experiences, roles, values, and relationships into a cohesive sense of self. This process allows us to say, “This is who I am,” across time and in different situations.
The renowned psychoanalyst Erik Erikson emphasized that the key developmental task of adolescence is the resolution of the psychosocial conflict between identity vs. role confusion. He proposed that a stable identity provides the individual with direction, resilience, and a sense of belonging.
Other theorists, such as Donald Winnicott, introduced the idea of the true self and false self, explaining how identity may be shaped by early relational experiences and the need to adapt to caregivers’ expectations, sometimes at the expense of one’s authentic self.
What Is Identity Disorder?
In clinical terms, Identity Disorder refers to a persistent and distressing lack of a stable and coherent sense of self. People struggling with this issue often describe feeling fragmented, empty, or unsure of who they are, especially in relationships or life transitions.
One of the most recognized contexts for identity disturbance is Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), where individuals may shift rapidly in their goals, self-image, and values. They may feel like a different person depending on whom they’re with or what emotions they’re
experiencing.
However, identity disturbance is not exclusive to BPD. It can appear in:
- Traumatized individuals with a disrupted sense of continuity
- Adolescents undergoing developmental crises
- Clients experiencing major life changes such as migration, divorce, or illness
Signs of Identity Disturbance May Include:
- Chronic feelings of emptiness or inner confusion
- Rapid changes in values, beliefs, or life goals
- Feeling like a “chameleon” — changing according to the people around them
- Intense fear of abandonment due to unstable self-worth
- Difficulty making decisions without external validation
Why Identity Matters in Therapy
Identity is not just a philosophical abstraction — it’s an emotional anchor. Without a cohesive sense of self, individuals may feel directionless, emotionally reactive, and prone to unhealthy relationships. Therapy provides a safe space for individuals to explore, construct, and integrate the fragmented parts of the self.
Therapists may use various approaches to support identity development:
- Psychoanalytic therapy explores early relational patterns that shaped the self.
- Narrative therapy helps clients rewrite personal stories with coherence and empowerment.
- Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) teaches skills to stabilize emotions and clarify values.
- EMDR therapy, often used for trauma, can target disturbing memories that obstruct identity cohesion.
A Gentle Reminder
Identity is not something you are born with fully formed — it is something we all develop, revise, and sometimes struggle with. The presence of identity confusion does not mean you are “broken”; it may signal that you are at a turning point of self-discovery. As a psychotherapist, I believe that identity struggles are not signs of failure, but invitations to heal and grow.
If You’re Struggling
If you or someone you know is experiencing identity confusion, therapy can offer a path toward clarity, integration, and emotional security. As a licensed psychotherapist, I provide a confidential and supportive space to help individuals rebuild a stable and fulfilling sense of self.